The start of 2018 saw my relationship with my boy hit the lowest low. It culminated in my boy taking back his keys.
Despite both of us doing our best to try and save our relationship, we were doing things which weren't working. We were both so angry and resentful of each other, we couldn't find a way forward. Our lives had become miserable, with continual arguments, conflict and hate. I was incredibly unhappy.
However, despite the unhappiness I felt within our relationship, sat with the keys, I felt even worse. I knew that without my boy, I would be more miserable. I also knew that there had been a time when we had been happy, in the beginning.
After 3 hours with the keys, it was my bedtime. If I went through the night without the keys, I would never take them back, so I asked boy to bring them back for me. He did. He would not have brought them back without my asking. We would have ended that night.
I knew I wanted to keep my boy, and so I began to ponder a different approach to making us better.
We made written commitments to each other on the fundamental issues which upset each of us the most, and we started counting; 1 day - without conflict, to build up something positive. One day really was an achievement!
I had always thought that talking things through was the way to resolve issues, that communication was the answer, but for us, this very rarely worked. I knew that we were treating each other nastily, saying and doing things we never would have done when we were new. I talked to boy about this and made;
Mantra 1 - treat us as if we were new.
We both practice this daily.
I have to take responsibility for making our relationship last, and to do this, I have to make some changes. That doesn't mean I have been wrong.
I have to accept, my boy does not have a submissive personality. We both often believe we are right in certain situations and we will argue our corner to the death of our relationship. So now, one of my techniques is just not to respond. I find it incredibly hard. But I have in my mind, argue to the death, or just leave it, and that makes it easier. It makes me sound like I am having to be submissive, and in some cases it does feel that way. I should always be right, my boy should accept that I am always right, and he should be the one who backs down. But right now, I am taking responsibility for saving us, and I am taking the lead.
Mantra 2 - I am above you in every way.
I am teaching boy this new mantra. It is going to be a long, slow process, but I am going to aim to work on infiltrating him with this thought and belief. When I am unresponsive when we could potentially conflict, I know, I am above him as I can see the longer term picture, and this is the reason for my silence.
Mantra 3 - Help me be a better boy, Mistress.
Our relationship is not one which is going to happen naturally, where we are just happy and content. I have to accept that I will always have to work and put effort in to making us be at peace, to maintaining my dominance and his submission.
This isn't what I expected for us, 5 years down the line, but I have cocklet, locked, and I have been able to be Mistress KeyHolder.
I won't let go of this easily. We are on day 20 of a new approach. I hope it lasts a lifetime.
Despite both of us doing our best to try and save our relationship, we were doing things which weren't working. We were both so angry and resentful of each other, we couldn't find a way forward. Our lives had become miserable, with continual arguments, conflict and hate. I was incredibly unhappy.
However, despite the unhappiness I felt within our relationship, sat with the keys, I felt even worse. I knew that without my boy, I would be more miserable. I also knew that there had been a time when we had been happy, in the beginning.
After 3 hours with the keys, it was my bedtime. If I went through the night without the keys, I would never take them back, so I asked boy to bring them back for me. He did. He would not have brought them back without my asking. We would have ended that night.
I knew I wanted to keep my boy, and so I began to ponder a different approach to making us better.
We made written commitments to each other on the fundamental issues which upset each of us the most, and we started counting; 1 day - without conflict, to build up something positive. One day really was an achievement!
I had always thought that talking things through was the way to resolve issues, that communication was the answer, but for us, this very rarely worked. I knew that we were treating each other nastily, saying and doing things we never would have done when we were new. I talked to boy about this and made;
Mantra 1 - treat us as if we were new.
We both practice this daily.
I have to take responsibility for making our relationship last, and to do this, I have to make some changes. That doesn't mean I have been wrong.
I have to accept, my boy does not have a submissive personality. We both often believe we are right in certain situations and we will argue our corner to the death of our relationship. So now, one of my techniques is just not to respond. I find it incredibly hard. But I have in my mind, argue to the death, or just leave it, and that makes it easier. It makes me sound like I am having to be submissive, and in some cases it does feel that way. I should always be right, my boy should accept that I am always right, and he should be the one who backs down. But right now, I am taking responsibility for saving us, and I am taking the lead.
Mantra 2 - I am above you in every way.
I am teaching boy this new mantra. It is going to be a long, slow process, but I am going to aim to work on infiltrating him with this thought and belief. When I am unresponsive when we could potentially conflict, I know, I am above him as I can see the longer term picture, and this is the reason for my silence.
Mantra 3 - Help me be a better boy, Mistress.
Our relationship is not one which is going to happen naturally, where we are just happy and content. I have to accept that I will always have to work and put effort in to making us be at peace, to maintaining my dominance and his submission.
This isn't what I expected for us, 5 years down the line, but I have cocklet, locked, and I have been able to be Mistress KeyHolder.
I won't let go of this easily. We are on day 20 of a new approach. I hope it lasts a lifetime.
so sad. when this slave learned of Your relationship with Your boy it was an education and this slave was deeply envious of said relationship ship. this slave hopes sincerely that MKH finds joy and fulfilment again
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